The first consultation with a couple: what to ask, and how to close

The first meeting is when a couple decides whether to trust you with their wedding. Not on your portfolio, which they’ve already seen, nor on your prices, which they may already know. They decide on a feeling: that they’ve been listened to by someone who knows exactly what they’re doing.

That feeling can be prepared. Structure the meeting so it lasts an hour, gives you everything you need to make a proposal, and ends with a contract rather than a “we’ll let you know”.

Before the meeting

Send a short questionnaire a few days before: date or season in mind, rough number of guests, region, overall budget, what they expect from you. Five questions, not twenty. You’ll arrive knowing whether the project fits your offer, and the couple will have started thinking about it.

The questions to ask

1. “Tell me how you picture the day”The opening question. Let them talk for ten minutes without interrupting: you’ll learn their priorities, their worries, and which of the two is driving the project.
2. “What matters most to you? And least?”Ask for three priorities. They’ll guide every budget decision, and you’ll remind the couple of them whenever they hesitate.
3. “What budget do you have in mind, and who’s contributing?”The figure, and the question that goes with it: if parents are paying, they’ll have their say, and it’s better to know now.
4. “Roughly how many guests?”And the follow-up: how many are coming from far away? That changes accommodation, transport, and sometimes the whole weekend.
5. “What worries you?”The question nobody asks, and the one that sells you best. Every worry is a chance to show how you handle it.
6. “What exactly do you expect from me?”Full planning, partial planning, on the day only. And what they want to do themselves: many couples are keen to choose their own styling.

What to show

Not a fifty-photo portfolio: the couple has already seen it on your website. Show how you work instead. A sample planning timeline, a supplier run sheet, the guest page of a real wedding that its guests opened on their phones. It’s concrete, reassuring, and it’s what other planners don’t show.

Talking about price

Give a range before the end of the meeting. “For a wedding like yours, full planning is between €4,000 and €5,500; I’ll send you a precise proposal by Thursday.” The couple knows what to expect, and if it’s beyond their budget, you know too, before spending two hours on a proposal.

Don’t apologise for your price, and don’t lower it on the spot. If the budget doesn’t stretch, offer a lighter package rather than a discount: partial planning or on-the-day coordination. It’s often what suits the couple best, and your pricing stays consistent.

Don’t give everything away

The classic trap: a meeting so generous that the couple leaves with three supplier names, a planning timeline and the idea for the venue. They no longer need you. Show that you know, without handing over the answers: “I’ve got two caterers in mind who would do exactly that; we’ll talk about them as soon as we start.”

Closing, and following up

End by stating the next step clearly: “I’ll send you my proposal on Thursday, with the contract. If it suits you, we’ll lock in your date when you sign.” Then send it within 48 hours, tailored, picking up their three priorities in their own words.

With no reply after a week, follow up once, simply. “Have you had time to look at my proposal? I can hold the date for you until Friday.” A short follow-up with a real deadline does more than a long message.